Football

I want to talk football, pigskin, Emmitt Smith, Nick Lache's ex, the freakin gridiron. Let's go. As far as the NFL is concerned, my BFF Jack put it best, "After 20 weeks of preseason, the regular season begins today (two days ago)." Now, my biggest fist pump goes out to Atlien Falcons. I was a long time haterade dranker, but Atl has another team they can be proud of, the other being the Hawks. Oh you were thinking the Force and the Silverbacks? A mere difference of opinion.

The Falcons were led by a no name coach, an previously unproven running back, and the best rookie QB the game has seen. Coach Mike Smith, soon to be crowned CMS, is what this crap team needed. A defensive mind, crazy son of a bitch. This guy does more cheering on Sunday's than those pathetic fans in the bleachers. OK, OK, they have gotten better. Smith wants to be there, unlike Donnie's boy Petrino aka Mr. Breakmyheart. The players have obviously responded. Michael Turner has been unbelievable (word made famous by Murray). I think Gus Johnson said he is He Hate Me's step nephew in-law. On the fo real, he has been the arguably most productive player in the league, and should be in the final vote for MVP. Matt Ryan looks like the kind of kid you would meet at a CYO get together, then throw you a 60 yard bomb off his back foot at St. Michael's stadium for 6. These three have done way more than any Falcon fan -- weird combo of words I'm sure -- could ever ask.

As for the rest of the NFL... Adrian Peterson won't last more than 4 or 5 more years. He's the strongest runner I've seen, but that fool takin some big ol hits. The Bills need to move to the CFL, New York doesn't need 3 teams. The Lions probably would not win a game in the Big 10. Frank Gore and MoJo Drew are the most underrated players in the game. The Texans kinda remind me of Georgia. And why can't Vince Young win games no more? I know it's not for lacking a Vick like type of game. Check. It's gotta be a color issue. Solved, fuck you Jeff Fischer and all the narrow minded Davie Crockets/Daniel Boones in Tennessee.

Nothing that cool happened this season in college. Remember when the Heisman trophy was all but being shipped to Bourbon Street to meet Knowshon? That didn't pan out. AJ Green is something to feel pretty good about. I think it's just a matter of another season before the U is obnoxious and on top again. Then, and only then will I be able to rest easy. Charlie Weis and Notre Dame have shown they belong in Division I football for atleast one more year with that win over Hawaii. Georgia played Hawaii one time...Weis is like the gross fat chick that thinks she is the shit. The only thing that is special about you Charlie, is that you take shits the size of a normal person. You are fat, and it's gross. Hey wait, is that where all of your 5 stars are going? Enough of this. Texas got hosed, but I guess if you're gonna play in Texas, you gotta have a fiddle in the band.

My dream bowl matchups are as follows:
Cotton Bowl - Ole Miss v. Morehouse (winner takes the others' freedom away)
Sugar Bowl - UGA v. Texas Tech (first one to a 100 pts wins)
Orange Bowl - Carolina v. Alabama v. Florida (triple threat; 3 biggest a hole coaches in the game)
Fiesta Bowl - New Mexico State v. San Diego State (very festive)
Rose Bowl - USC v. Big Ten All Conference Team (go away big ten)
Championship - Utah v. Boise State (12-0 v 12-0, a fairytale game if you ask me)

My preseason Super Bowl picks were the Chargers and Eagles so right now I'm...

Cowboys are losing their edge. Trade TO, Romo, and Jessica Simpson for the first pick, and boom there you have the Lone Ranger himself, Matt Stafford in your freakin lap. Do it.



Super excited about Friday! I'm going to be listening to "When the Saint Go Marching In" the rest of the week.